Finally! A Starbucks Bleuch That Doesn't Suck.

It took a while, but I finally found a Starbucks VIA bleuch that doesn't totally suck!  Starbucks VIA Tribute Bleuch is pretty OK.  I'm not going to say it's awesome, because it isn't.  The most I can say is that I didn't grimace and go "Euch" on my first sip.  I didn't get that disgusting acidic burnt flavour that is Starbuck's trademark.  It also didn't have a watered-down taste the way the Veranda Bleuch does. It doesn't taste of anything but coffee. Pretty decent, OK coffee.  In fact, I'd say that it tastes a lot like MacDonald's new coffee.

The espresso cup is amazed that the culturally insensitive mug was emptied of its contents.

Now you may be wondering why the hell I keep buying Starbucks VIA Bleuch when I obviously dislike it.  Well, it's because of all the instant coffees, it's the only one that doesn't taste absolutely hideous.  Most instants taste like coffee-flavoured syrup dissolved in water.  They have this weird, empty aftertaste that makes you question why anyone not stuck on a submarine in the South Pacific circa 1944 would agree to drink this shit.  It also confirms that instant Karma doesn't exist because the marketing geniuses who convinced people not stuck on a submarine in the South Pacific circa 1944 to drink this shit weren't automatically struck by lightning or hit by giant boulders on their ways home.

Starbucks VIA at least tastes like real coffee.  It tastes like Starbucks shitty coffee, yes, but coffee nonetheless. 

Not a Pretty Coffee

Goddamned htc Whatever S Phone!  I took pictures today, uploaded them, and was all impressed at how easy it was (at the price of Google owning my mortal soul), only to find that the photos were awful.  AWFUL.  But, you know, no one reads this blog for the pictures anyways (or reads this blog, period), so I wrote up the whole, stupid post.

Bleuch.

Then I started wondering if I didn't actually know how to use the stupid phone's camera, so I tried to upload them again using a different image size and ta-da! it was all awesome!

Except for the fact that the phone's Blogger app overwrote my published post.  Fuckers. 

Anyways. Onward and upward.  Or something.  Whatever.  S.

To be different, I bought Starbuck VIA Veranda Bleuch in the hopes that the milder roast would not have the burnt ass taste of most Starbucks bleuchs.  But no.  Instead it tasted like watered-down burnt ass.  Lovely.  This shouldn't have surprised me given that the description of the coffee at the back of the pack was reminiscent of Tweeks coffee on South Park.

Fortunately, there was a lunch-and-learn today for the R&D team and they had leftover pizza, Doritos and Lays that they kindly left for us in the break room.  The Cheesy Doritos took care of aftertaste from the bleuch.

Doritos! Doritos! Doritos!

Hello, It's Tea Again

I keep thinking that that Todd Rundgren song, "Hello It's Me", is actually "Hello, It's Me Again". I don't know why. I even checked the lyrics and nowhere in the song does he say "again".  Maybe I secretly think that he's been calling this chick up all the time to discuss whatever problem they're having -- which appears to be either that he's in denial about being in a relationship, or she thinks she needs to see other people and he's like, what?...I'm not sure.  It's probably some 1970s-open-relationship-shag-carpet problem.

Anyways.

I'm at home drinking peppermint tea, which means I'm under the weather. But I'm still working, dammit! I keep writing a rewriting this doc to the point where it's stopped making sense. But that might be the Tylenol speaking.

Everything tastes better in cute cups.

However, I am getting a chance to use the new Ritzenhoff My Lian Dieter Braun teacups Spousal Unit got me for Xmas. They don't appear to be available in Canada, so I'm going to assume they cost him a lot. He probably shouldn't have spent that much money on cups, even if they are The Cutest. And they are somewhat matchy with my Ketto Design mug, which has apparently been discontinued (things you find out when looking for a gift for someone). Today my mug held a cup of Starbucks Via Columbian, which is marginally better than Xmas Bleuch.

The Return of the Xmas Bleuch

Dammit, Silvia and Rocky!  Because of the two of you I've had to go back to drinking Starbucks VIA Xmas Bleuch in the morning!  Because of you, I needed to down it with a stupid sesame-poppy-seed cracker and water.  But this morning the water cooler was out of order, so I had to drink the tap water and THAT tastes like water with dissolved metal in it.  Fie upon you Rocky and Silvia!  Fie!

Chartreuse Mug looks pretty pissed off.

I tried, Silvia&Rocky.  I tried.  I even looked up stupid online videos about how to use you.  You know what I found out?  I found out that you, Rocky, never actually dispense the right amount of coffee.   So I tried eyeballing the amount of coffee that was going into Silvia.  But no dice.  NO DICE.  The coffee was still weak and revolting. 

I surmised that possibly it was the coffee.  But the coffee is fancy-ass Black Cat Classic Espresso coffee!  It's supposed to be The Shit. 

Being the good little former-scientist I am, I decided to just try my own coffee in the Silvia.  You may remember (if you exist) that my coffee had made the office a little insane when I made it initially.  I expected the same effect this time.

Alas, this was not the case.  I made a double with my coffee and it was OK.  It was way, way better than with the fancy-ass Black Cat coffee, but it still wasn't the same syrupy-strong cup that the Silvia made initially.  Nor was it as tasty as the coffee Desktop Espresso made. 

Obviously something has happened to Silvia in the past two weeks that I've been away.  And obviously Black Cat Espresso is not The Shit.

As such, Silvia&Rocky's Evil Empire has been defeated by the scrappy Desktop Espresso Team.  For now, at least.

Which One's Han Solo?

Sad Music and Sadder Food

Today was a rainy December day.  You know the type of day where it's too warm to snow, but too cold to really feel like it's not winter?  It's the type of day they fail to discuss when they talk about Global Warming.

The snack closet appears to be channeling this craptastic weather as it's been "festively bare".  It's full of bizarre crap like sesame and poppy seed crackers and Ritz crackers in the shape of Yuletide Trees. The cheese is some kind of spreadable variety and the cookies are some fancy cranberry almond biscotti thins.

I ate some sad little Yule tree crackers, downing them with Starbucks VIA Xmas Bleuch while listening to Pink Floyd's The Wall and editing a document. It was a dismal moment and, as Comfortably Numb came on, I seriously considered putting down my pen, shredding the document, deleting its electronic counterpart, and leaving work to go sit near the duck pond in the next business park over.  In the rain.  In the cold, cold winter rain.


But then The Show Must Go On  was next and I remembered that I don't like the rest of The Wall, so I switched to a different playlist.  As REM's These Days played, I felt better.  I also discovered that there were Two-Bite Brownies hiding behind the sesame seed crackers in the closet.


Later on I had the homemade chocolate chip buttermilk muffin I had brought from home.  It was tasty.  I also changed my playlist to something fluffy, like the muffin, and listened to Friend Crush by Friends while I ate it.

Food: Real and Faux, But Mostly Faux

This morning I woke up early and made myself a healthy breakfast of pocket eggs (eggs in a basket?) and orange-and-peach juice.  It was tasty.  It was nutritious.  It was healthy.  It filled me up and made me ready for the day.  Alls I really wanted was a nice hot chocolate to go with it, but alas, I forgot that I had Ghirardelli instant hot chocolate in the house.

I also totally forgot to take a picture of the empty plate til I was halfway to work.  *sigh*

That was prettymuch it for real food for the day.  

Because I didn't feel like making myself a tuna sandwich for lunch, I ended up not bringing a lunch.  When noontime came around, I had the choice between eating  the Uncle Ben's microwavable rice'n'sauce I keep in the office for emergencies or going out to eat.  I didn't want to get in my car, so I ended up taking out from the greasy spoon cafeteria in the next office building over. 

As today was Friday, they had their usual fish'n'chips.  I've had their fish'n'chips.  It's white fish in a really thick, greasy batter.  The whole thing is fried to death so that the fish is a tough, tasteless wafer.   However, today they also had quesadillas on the menu.  All the guys in the office keep going on about the quesadillas, so I decided to order 'em.  They were...OK?  It was basically chicken, red peppers, onions and cheese between two tortillas.  It was edible.  They gave me two squares of banana bread free (they were in that little baggy at the back).  For a beverage, I chose an A&W Root Beer from the drink fridge in the office.  I figured if I was going to have something revolting for lunch, I might as well also have some high fructose corn syrup to go with it.

 

After lunch, a couple of coworkers and I went to Starbucks.  I should have had the hot chocolate, but I had an espresso.  And I ordered a rice krispy square to go with it.  The rice krispy square was incredibly sweet, so I couldn't finish it.  I finished it at the office with the help of some water (blue cup) and leftover instant Starbucks VIA Xmas Bleuch coffee from the morning (chartreuse mug).  You can see my espresso cup (unwashed from yesterday) in the background,  feeling rejected.