Revenge of The Office Snack Closet

Oh dear.

The office snack closet had been bare for so many days that I had forgotten about its usual bounty. This morning I opened it expecting some stale social tea cookies and maybe a Ritz cracker or two. I was not at all prepared for what I found: Hostess Vanilla Cupcakes! I had never had a Hostess Cupcake, vanilla or otherwise, before. I had heard of them, but never bought one because, you know, snacky cakes are bad for you. Today, though, those vanilla cupcakes were in the snack closet, so they were provided by the God of the Snack Closet (i.e. our office manager, Linda) for me to consume. It was a sign.

Today, as an exception, there is a picture of food. It is the picture of the uneaten Hostess cupcakes. I took one bite and spit it out. That was a vile, vile piece of edible food-like substance!

I didn't know what I had done to offend the God of the Snack Closet, but I promised to atone! I promised to clean the sink and put dirty dishes in the dishwasher. Anything for the God of the Snack Closet to never tempt me with anymore facsimiles of food ever again!

Then one of my coworkers popped by my desk and scarfed down my untouched cupcake and asked me if there were any more in the snack closet.